Laura's Designs: Looking For Oscar

Laura's Designs: Looking For Oscar: Credits: Delighfully Amazing Page Kit by Nicole Young

The Sandusky Hospice...

For some reason even though I have never actually been to Sandusky, Ohio, I dreamed I worked at a hospice there, because it was the only place that would hire me full time. I helped people and made them laugh and on bring your daughter to work day my girl Isabelle went with me and we walked hand-in-hand around from room to room and bed to bed making people smile at the end of their lives and she spoke her first words that day...
She said, "I want pretzels!"
and of course then I woke up...

Teaching Horror...

Last night I dreamed I was hired to teach horror to upcoming writers at an art college of some sort... So my fiance and I went down there and there was this long lecture i went thru where I explained how to build tension and suspense by way of citing examples in Grimm's fairy tales and John Carpenter's the Thing.. the lecture went great and we were in some warehouse where they were supplementing the colleges income by selling books... this kid who had been at the lecture came up to Laura and I while we were sitting eating lunch and watching these poor grad students packing and shipping books to ask me if i could make learning about Greek tragedies fun like I had horror.  I was reading some comics and showing him some examples in "Knights of the Dinner Table" when his professor came up, the guy looked like a combination of Sebastian bach from skid row and david hyde pierce from frasier.. and he was pissed that I was trying to teach his student better than he could or some shit and was ranting and raving and screaming he was gonna get me fired and what not...
then I woke up...

My Mind...

Last night I dreamed once more that I was given the chance to make a TV show out of a blog I wrote with my friend Victor, called Hicks in the Apocalypse. found here...

http://hicksintheapocalypse.wordpress.com/2009/10/03/the-flash/

Sadly they were fucking it up and I spent most of the dream running around the set screaming at people to stop fucking up my story while my friend and co-author Victor smoked huge cigars and drank scotch and told me to stop worrying about it so much... needless to say I was pretty angry when I woke up from this fiasco, why does my subconscious do this sorta thing to me all the time... its like hey here is a dream come true for ya pal... now I am gonna take a dump on it... enjoy...

Mech Crew...

Last night I dreamed I worked on a Mech Carrier and my crew and I serviced a squad of Mech called the Hillary Spanx. We fought in a war against some aliens with squid heads and otherwise perfect female bodies. There was only two males born per million squid girls born so they worshiped males... turns out human sperm worked for them... so they invaded... it was such an anime dream and I havent even watched an anime in over a year now. I am going to have to use this as the basis of a novel, it was very fun. I had three women on the maintenance crew with me and one of them was my fiance and the other two were in love with each other. We found out that some slimy politician had signed a treaty with the aliens to supply them with as much sperm as they wanted if they would honor a cease fire. Our carrier and all the other forces were ordered to stand down. My fiance and I didn't want my sperm to be collected and used by these aliens and so we jumped overboard and swam for it... that was when I woke up...

Bizarro job...

All right so last night I dreamed that I work in publishing Bizarro books, but while eraserhead is on the 8th floor of the building along with avant punk, and deadite press, the rest of the imprints go down in floors and then get to the lowest level, which was the imprint that I ran, on the first floor. Scabby Goat Waffle books was the imprint I ran, and I came to work everyday in this huge Cadillac from the '70s it was convertible and pink... Two of my employees were even bigger Carlton Mellick fans than I am and they were trying to grow out their mutton chops but only to pitiful effect. I would get there in the morning, which it seems important to note that the two guys who I car pool with to work each day always ask me to stop at this or that store to get this or that to eat or drink and I always agree and tell them that sounds great lets do it. and then I never stop and just haul ass right to work...But when I get there in the morning I would always see people getting set up for their presentations for one of the imprints up on the higher floors, and I would gaze in wonder at how fancy they were because the people who send me stuff to try to get it published, usually sent it in a shabby manilla envelope often with food and blood stains on it. I did get to sit in a morning meeting with the heads of each floor with Rose OKeefe but she was always so busy talking with the cool dept heads from the other floors that I never get a chance to even get within 12 feet of her. She once waved at me as the elevator doors closed though... I swear she did..

Flooded Garage...

Last night I dreamed that I worked at a large newspaper downtown, they have a huge underground parking lot. In the lot there is only one level that is on the ground floor the other three levels are under ground, well the parking garage floods. It is filled up with dark murky water and alot of people lost their cars down in there. They have a structural engineer come out and he cannot figure out how to drain the water since they don't know where it came from in the first place, they also don't know why it flooded now instead of years ago when they first put the thing in. So then everyone is taking turns with this wetsuit one of the execs bought and diving down to their car and grabbing cd's and such. Of course there is something in the water, and it yanks the scuba mask off of this lady while she is down there. Just as she turns to see what it was that grabbed her ...I wake up